Marriage

[Agnii]

Rich people grand ah seira events oda ithum seilamey... poor ku food kudukalamey... employment kudukalamey....

Haha... Employment illaiya? Food illaiya?
Marriage la evlo vishayangal irukku... Such a grand event and it provides employment to many people... Grand wedding ku event management companies la irundhu, normal ah kalyana mandapam la food contract edukkara unorganised sector varaikkum, evlo Peru and evlo families benefit aagranga...

Enakku oru vishayam puriyala... Marriage ku selavu pandra kaasu waste nu yen nenaikkaringa? Unga definition padi useful na enna?

This question is open to all and not only to Nila

 

[Agnii]

if you think about it, happiness in itself is "notional". Say your company gives you Rs 5 lakhs worth of stock as a performance incentive, wont you feel happy? Say you win a lottery, wont you feel happy?
Lets say someone wants to have a grand wedding and spends their entire fortune, life savings on the wedding. Once it is all over, when they see the 5 zeros disappear in their bank account, would they still feel happy?
And for some, they just love saving money. Athula interest varutha or what are they saving for nu kooda idea irukaathu, they will so happy and satisfied that they have this huge sum in the bank. They enjoy that status, a financial security, that makes them happy.

All these make people happy, but for how long? I feel personally that time with someone builds memories, and these memories will give you happiness as long as your alive or get dementia.

Haha, adhey dhane naanum soldren. Orutharku life fulla avar serthu vecha kaasa, paarthuttey irukkaradhu secured ah iruku, sandhoshama irukku apdina... Innorthar adhey money ya, andha event la selavu panni kedaikkara sandhoshathula enna thappu irukku?

So it is all about how you perceive, right? Or what do you think is reasonable. Enaku indha rendu perula, the one who spends seems more logical and more convincing.
Coz, he celebrates his successful life in that one particular event. He would have undergone lot of struggles in raising up the children, apram family, job nu evlavo... So avanga daughter/son wedding la, he celebrates the successful journey ...

And next day bank balance koranjidumnu avangaluku theriyaamaya pandraru? I tell you one thing, COVID time la en friend-ku marriage aachu... Appo irundha restrictions nala grand wedding panna mudilanu dhan avaloda appa romba feel pannaru... Coz North Indian culture la, wedding andha madiri dhan... Evlo evlo grand ah pandrangalo, avlo happy and satisfied ah iruppanga.. they regret only when they spend lesser than what they had planned, or what their brothers or sisters spent, lol

 

[Agnii]

 

[Meen]

So it is all about how you perceive, right? Or what do you think is reasonable. Enaku indha rendu perula, the one who spends seems more logical and more convincing.

yes perception differ. My point is spending or saving money could both bring happiness depending on individual's perception. No right or wrong, and no question of logic. But this happiness is short lived.
When you spend time to create moments, that will forever bring you happiness, all you have to do is think about it.

A grand wedding is useless if you don't have the close ones there to celebrate with you. You wont have any close ones unless you spend time with them. Time is at any given time, more valuable than money

 

[Agnii]

A grand wedding is useless if you don't have the closed ones there to celebrate with you. You wont have any closed ones unless you spend time with them. Time is at any given time, more valuable than money

Yea, well said

 

[Balan72]

Marriage ku selavu pandra kaasu waste nu yen nenaikkaringa?

Spending on wedding per se isn’t inappropriate. Elite people who have more and earn more would of course spend lavishly celebrating their family wedding. That’s fine. It’ll be a little proportion of their wealth. Such elites conserving the wealth without spending is sickness.

Whereas, people being in middle class and earning little but toiling all the life to match the elites’ lavishness is madness. Emptying in one single day that one earns for a lifetime is a very very bad trade. A lifetime traded for a day. That’s insane. And that’s mostly not self driven or self satisfying. It’s to match the race that the elites never intend to participate but the show off paupers take it as challenge and run on their own. Rats haplessly conditioned by the culture.

Skewed behaviour. Statistically speaking.

 

[Balan72]

Time is at any given time, more valuable than money

Absolutely. Limited the supply, more the value. So trading time and energy spent to create memorable moments is wiseழ.
As simple as that.

 

[Agnii]

Spending on wedding per se isn’t inappropriate. Elite people who have more and earn more would of course spend lavishly celebrating their family wedding. That’s fine. It’ll be a little proportion of their wealth. Such elites conserving the wealth without spending is sickness.

Whereas, people being in middle class and earning little but toiling all the life to match the elites’ lavishness is madness. Emptying in one single day that one earns for a lifetime is a very very bad trade. A lifetime traded for a day. That’s insane. And that’s mostly not self driven or self satisfying. It’s to match the race that the elites never intend to participate but the show off paupers take it as challenge and run on their own. Rats haplessly conditioned by the culture.

Skewed behaviour. Statistically speaking.

Yea, naanum kadan vaangi romba lavish ah selavu pandravanga, or viruppame illaama selavu pandravangala pathi sollala... I spoke only abt people who find happiness in such spending... And surely, adhu lifetime fulla earn panninadhaa irukkadhu... Only a portion of it

 

[Nilaa]

Haha... Employment illaiya? Food illaiya?
Marriage la evlo vishayangal irukku... Such a grand event and it provides employment to many people... Grand wedding ku event management companies la irundhu, normal ah kalyana mandapam la food contract edukkara unorganised sector varaikkum, evlo Peru and evlo families benefit aagranga...

Enakku oru vishayam puriyala... Marriage ku selavu pandra kaasu waste nu yen nenaikkaringa? Unga definition padi useful na enna?

This question is open to all and not only to Nila

Kalyanathula neraya peruku opportunity kidaikuthu.. athu okie...

Oru marriage aadambarama seirathu.. athuku vara millionaire celebrities ku elam sponsor seirathu invitation la kuda affluent nu status kaatrathu ithuku seira selavu la help seilamey solrun...

Event once than.. its a sweet memory.
athuku happy ah seilam thapu ila.... jasthe aadmabaram yen? waste thana ?

Oru nal event ku yen avlo waste seinum...

 

[Agnii]

Kalyanathula neraya peruku opportunity kidaikuthu.. athu okie...

Oru marriage aadambarama seirathu.. athuku vara millionaire celebrities ku elam sponsor seirathu invitation la kuda affluent nu status kaatrathu ithuku seira selavu la help seilamey solrun...

Event once than.. its a sweet memory.
athuku happy ah seilam thapu ila.... jasthe aadmabaram yen? waste thana ?

Oru nal event ku yen avlo waste seinum...

Adhellam disposables dhane... Oru bouquet vaangrom, next day andha poo ellam vaadi poiyidumnu theriyum, still yen avlo kaasu koduthu vaanganum? Just andha moment ku... Avlodhan..

But andha product naala currency circulate aagudhu... It is changing hands, bouquet shop naala epdi silarukku income generate aagudho, cards naala silaruku aagudhu...

Real waste is register marriage yaarayum pozhaikka vidaama, kamukkama poyi kalyanam pannikradhu...

 

[Nilaa]

Real waste is register marriage yaarayum pozhaikka vidaama, kamukkama poyi kalyanam pannikradhu..

Oho...

 

[Nilaa]

Adhellam disposables dhane... Oru bouquet vaangrom, next day andha poo ellam vaadi poiyidumnu theriyum, still yen avlo kaasu koduthu vaanganum? Just andha moment ku... Avlodhan..

But andha product naala currency circulate aagudhu... It is changing hands, bouquet shop naala epdi silarukku income generate aagudho, cards naala silaruku aagudhu...

Real waste is register marriage yaarayum pozhaikka vidaama, kamukkama poyi kalyanam pannikradhu...

En sister marriage apo, register office la
inoru marriage..

Rathous la campus la oru 5 per than ponnu mapla kuda... apram foto ku oruthar.. oru foldable coffee table kondu vanthu irunthanka... atha potu , cool drinks glass la kuduchanka... avlo than marriage

Nan kuda enaku oru glass kudupanka formality ku expect senjan aana kupdala

 

[Meen]

Real waste is register marriage yaarayum pozhaikka vidaama, kamukkama poyi kalyanam pannikradhu...

appo lawyers pozhaikka veika elarayum divorce um pana solveengala?

 

[Agnii]

appo lawyers pozhaikka veika elarayum divorce um pana solveengala?

 

[Balan72]

appo lawyers pozhaikka veika elarayum divorce um pana solveengala?

Nailed it. ha ha.

 

[Balan72]

But andha product naala currency circulate aagudhu... It is changing hands, bouquet shop naala epdi silarukku income generate aagudho, cards naala silaruku aagudhu...

I dont know why this currency circulation has gotten into your mind somehow. But a waste is a waste. As simple as that.

Of all our cousins, the richest of all is one who pursued medicine and he fell in love with his college mate who was a from a simple family. He attempted for permissions properly giving due respects but the elders stood their stand, so he had to register with his humble house surgeon stipend savings. Otherwise, that would have been a bash for their wealth. We all other cousins just married as usual with few millions show off spends like the affluent do.

I would say, none of us had lived a fulfilled life like that of him and my anni. That 2000 rupees marriage bought them so much of happiness and also for our family later other marriages could not match.

 

[AnbudanJeev]

விட்டு கொடுக்கும் மனப்பக்குவம், இல்லையென்றால், எந்த திருமணமும் நிறைவை தராது

 

[Goodie]

Mine was an arranged one.

And you are happy now?

 

[Goodie]

Mine was an
Now having said that, i m yet to comprehend 2 things that are common sight in this world.
(1) why at all people do arranged marriages? i mean why the hell they cant wait to fall in love and marry the love of your life

It's not by choice right?

Idhu kooda oru alavukku purinjaalum puriyum. People may thereafter start loving by chance and then start living.
(2) Having fallen in love and married, if they keep looking around for some other partner, i wonder why they use this word "Love"?
In case that is love, then what is trash?

Then he/she never really loved

 

[Balan72]

And you are happy now?

(of all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these - it could have been)